No Sacrifice Page 45

  “Mama’s Christmas gift!” Patrick replied, and Chance was grateful for Patrick’s quick thinking.

  “Ohh! What am I getting?”

  “I’m not telling!” Patrick said, shaking his head. “You have to wait until tomorrow, like everyone else.”

  Kalea pouted. “Do you know?” she asked Chance hopefully.

  “I’m afraid not Ma’… uh, Mama.” Chance squirmed a little.

  Kalea sighed. “Fine.” She sniffed. “None of my kids love me.” Chance grinned when Patrick, Quinn, and Alana all snorted at the same time. “See, Chance?” She shook her head. “Well, then, I’ll just have to pull the really embarrassing pictures and stories out later.”

  Patrick groaned. “Mama!”

  “You going to tell me?”

  Patrick scowled. “No.”

  “Well, then.” She grinned evilly, and Patrick’s scowl deepened. “Tough. Now, Patrick, get the dishes out and show Chance where the silverware is.”

  Christmas in Southern California was certainly not cold. But he’d never had one quite so warm either. Patrick assured him the ninety-degree day was unusual, but it still felt a little weird to be wearing swim trunks and a light, short-sleeved Hawai’ian shirt—one of his presents—on Christmas day.

  He currently sat on a blanket on the beach just past the end of the Tearney property. Patrick told him it stretched for a couple of miles in each direction, and though it was technically public, there was usually very little traffic on it. Today that didn’t seem true, as the beach was crowded as far as Chance could see in both directions.

  The Tearneys, including Tutu, Patrick’s parents, and all of the siblings, nieces, and nephews, currently took up a good chunk of the beach. Patrick and his brothers were out on boards. He’d offered to teach Chance, but Chance had declined. Maybe when they were back in California—and not being watched by Patrick’s entire family—he’d feel comfortable falling off a surfboard until he got the hang of it.

  He’d noticed Patrick’s youngest sister, though she’d been polite when they were introduced, immediately distanced herself. Thus far, some three hours after the party started, she hadn’t spoken once to Patrick. Chance saw his lover’s expression and wished he could offer some kind of comfort, but it wasn’t possible with everyone watching.

  He turned his attention back to his biggest and most valued present—a ukulele. He’d kind of always thought of them like one of those funny instruments just for play, sort of like the recorder everyone learned in elementary school. But the songbook Tutu had given him had a number of very beautiful songs in it, and he’d been working on learning them all morning.

  So far, Chance was pretty sure they’d fooled Patrick’s parents and most of the siblings. The only one to look at him funny was Devin, but he hadn’t yet said anything, and Patrick had been sure he wouldn’t. It was another reason he’d happily found a spot toward the back and stayed on his blanket, learning the uke.

  But even in a family as big as Patrick’s, no one was allowed to disappear completely. Patrick told them about Chance’s music during the dinner luau, and before he knew it, he’d retrieved his guitar and was working his way through the more popular songs he usually sang at Sophia’s.

  “Do you know ‘Hotel California’?” Patrick’s other sister, Leia, asked.

  In Chance’s opinion, any musician worth his salt learned that song at some point. And then, of course, there was something about living in California that meant most people assumed he knew the song. Of course they were right, but he’d learned it long before he made it to California. Doug’s death had made him exceedingly aware of the dangers of addiction, and learning the song had been a way to remember and honor him. “Which one?” he asked and smiled when Leia’s eyes widened.

  “You know both?”

  Chance smiled even wider, glanced at Patrick to see a grin on his boyfriend’s face, and started picking the opening of the acoustic version. Everyone around him got silent, which usually made Chance even more nervous, and though it wasn’t as bad as it normally was, he still felt tense.

  It faded some as he got into the music and disappeared entirely when Patrick picked up the chorus and sang with him. Just the sound of Patrick’s voice helped him stop thinking so much about what was around them. He could imagine it was just the two of them in a room playing and singing.

  When the song ended, there was plenty of applause and even some cheering. He got a few more requests—some he could honor and a couple he couldn’t. Then, bless him, Quinn started making noise about being the last ones on the beach and it being time to go in. Chance suspected Quinn knew more than he let on, but Chance didn’t know quite how much. Patrick was convinced Quinn didn’t care about what they were to each other, even if he knew, and Chance hoped that was true.

  Corralling a family—which Chance had minor experience with, thanks to Avery—was always time consuming. He and Patrick helped gather things together and carry them back to the house. And then, in the chaos, they slipped back out and found a quiet spot farther down the beach out of sight of the house.

  They settled on the blanket, looking at the stars, but Chance couldn’t keep from touching any longer. “I’d never have believed I’d have trouble going two days without sex. If someone had told me that a year ago, I’d have laughed at him.” Chance pulled Patrick in until he was sitting between Chance’s legs, their arms wrapped around each other.

  Patrick chuckled. “Same here. When I first reacted to Rhys, I’d gone, um… I think I figured out it was a year? Something like that, since I’d done anything. And now? I’m going fucking batshit without you for two days.”

  “Well…,” Chance murmured, nipping at Patrick’s neck. He forgot for a moment what he was going to say as he tasted his lover’s skin and found a bit of saltiness leftover from the ocean mixed with Patrick’s usual flavor. “Mmm. Missed this,” he whispered. “Missed you.”

  “Missed you, too, a ghrá.” Patrick turned his head, and then their lips were locked and any coherent thought fled. In no time Patrick was on his back, Chance over him, their mouths crushed, cocks hard and grinding together, and bodies straining toward each other. “Fuck,” Patrick bit off when they broke apart for air. “Wish I’d thought to bring stuff.”

  Chance grinned, kissed him again, then sat up and reached for his guitar case. He opened an inner pocket and pulled out a foil packet and small bottle. “I’d kind of hoped we might find some private time.”

  “Oh my God, I love you,” Patrick said, then tackled him.

  Chance was more than a little embarrassed by how fast it went. It took approximately five seconds for their swim trunks to come off, another five after that for latex and lube to be in place, and then he was inside Patrick and thrusting. Patrick sat up with him, riding him, the two of them moving together.

  “Feel so good, baby,” Chance murmured, nipping at Patrick’s shoulder. His only answer was a groan and Patrick’s hand tightening on his hip. Chance did what he could to focus on Patrick and make it last. He had no idea when they might be together again, and he didn’t want this over too soon.

  But it had been longer than they were used to going, and coupled with the inability to touch, kiss, or anything else during the day, this just felt too fucking incredible. Whether he liked it or not, it wasn’t going to last and he knew it. So he thrust harder, did his damnedest to keep some kind of rhythm with his hand, and when he knew he was right there, grunted something to that effect.

  Apparently Patrick was just as crazy as he was, and a few seconds later a mess covered the blanket and Patrick’s muscles clamped, sending him over the edge as well. He bit Patrick’s shoulder in an attempt to hold back the shout and shook hard with the force of the climax that screamed through him. He held on as long as he could, slowing as the pleasure faded.

  When it was over, they both fell sideways, barely missing the mess. Chance panted, trying to gather a few wits and some breath, but it wasn’t working too well. He finally pulled car
efully out of Patrick and noticed he’d filled the condom. He snickered as he took care of it.

  “Hmm?” Patrick asked, still not moving much.

  “You’re not the only one who was full of it.”

  Patrick chuckled and finally rolled to face him. “We’ve gotten spoiled.”

  “Indeed,” Chance agreed, stretching out next to Patrick. Chance reached up and ran a finger over one of Patrick’s cheeks, then traced the line to his chin and down the column of his neck. “I like Hawai’i, but I have to admit I’m looking forward to going home. If only because I miss touching you.”

  Patrick cupped Chance’s face. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry we can’t be to them what we are.” Patrick grimaced. “That… didn’t make any sense.”

  Chance grinned. “Be fair. I pretty much just fucked your brains out.”

  Patrick laughed. “Pretty much.” He dropped another kiss on Chance’s lips, then sat up and reached for the bag he’d brought to the beach. When he turned back, he held an oblong jewelry box. “Okay, so the Aloha shirt was something to give you in front of the family. And kind of a joke. This, uh….” He cleared his throat, and Chance saw color on Patrick’s cheeks. “This is your real gift.”

  Chance twisted around and opened his case again. Under the guitar, he plucked out a thin, flat square. “It’s, uh, not much. I mean, it didn’t cost me much, but… I thought something like this might look weird to your family. The coffee mug was just something, you know, fun.”

  Patrick smiled. “I loved the coffee mug. And as my best friend, they didn’t even question why you’d be holding Avery in one of the pictures.”

  They handed each other the gifts, and both looked up, waiting.

  Chance laughed. “You go first.”

  Patrick gave a fake glare, then tore at the paper. When he opened it, he stared. “It’s… wow. It’s perfect.”

  “It’s not that great,” Chance muttered, blushing. “I just… you told me how much you liked hearing me sing some of those songs, so I thought….” His color darkened and he squirmed.

  Patrick opened the CD case and smiled, then read out loud: “You have brightened my days, warmed my nights, given me love and comfort, made me a father. You are the most incredible man in the world. I hope this gives you even a small bit of the happiness that you give me every day.” He looked up again and reached out to touch Chance’s face. “I don’t have the way with words that you do. I… you give me all of that too. Well, not the father part. But you make me a better da by being an awesome dad yourself. Thank you.” He leaned in and kissed Chance, but before Chance could return it, he sat back.

  Chance felt the heat fade from his cheeks, and he took a deep breath. “I’m glad you like it. I, uh, have them in MP3 format for your phone, if you want. You won’t have to rip them.”

  Patrick grinned. “Good. You can put them on when we get home. Now, it’s your turn.”

  It took him a moment to get the paper off, but when he opened it, it was worth it. “This is… wow. It’s beautiful.” He lifted the necklace out of the box and held it up. “Seahorse?”

  Patrick nodded. “Yes. The Chinese believed that the seahorse was a form of sea dragon.” Chance turned it to see the gold inset with wood and a gem for the eye. The tail curved around, all in gold, and the chain matched. “The wood is koa wood, which only grows here on the islands. It represents strength and bravery. And we believe the seahorse is a symbol of power and good luck.”

  Chance opened the clasp and immediately put it on. It had a bit of weight to it and felt good where it rested just below his collarbone. “I love it. It’s gorgeous. Thank you.” He leaned in and pulled Patrick in for another kiss.

  “I would have given it to you in front of my parents, but Dev and Ali both would recognize the gold and diamond. And it would just have cemented in Dev’s mind what you are to me.”

  Chance nearly choked on his breath. “Gold and diamond?” He looked down but, of course, couldn’t see it very well.

  Patrick blushed but nodded. “The eye is, uh, diamond, but it’s not big or anything, really. But, uh, yeah, the gold is real. It just… they wouldn’t understand why I’d spend money on “just” a friend, you know? Even a best friend.”

  Chance had to force himself to breathe. His little gift seemed even more pathetic after that. But he realized Patrick put a lot of thought and love into his gift, just as he did, so he couldn’t fault his lover. “Yeah, I can see that. I don’t want to sound ungrateful or anything. It’s gorgeous, and I love it. You just… didn’t have to spend a lot on me.”

  Patrick smiled. “I know. I have exactly two people in the world I can really spoil. You and Avery. Three if you count my mother. I don’t do it a lot other times. So….” He squirmed, obviously uncomfortable.

  Chance kissed him. “I’m sorry. It’s gorgeous. Should I, uh, not wear it here?”

  “You can. Tell them you got it for yourself or something.”

  Chance nodded. “Okay. Thanks.”

  They dressed, cleaned up the paper and blanket as best they could, and put everything away, but neither of them was interested in going in just yet. They sat on part of the blanket and wrapped the rest around them, Patrick sitting in front of Chance, in his arms. Chance savored the time they had to hold and buried his face in Patrick’s neck.

  Patrick turned around enough to catch his lips in another kiss. “I don’t think I can get enough of those. I love you.”

  Chance smiled and tightened his arms a little. “Me either. I love you too.”

  They leaned in to kiss again when a voice came out of the darkness behind them.

  “You know, this is probably not the best place to fuck if you don’t want Mama to know you’re gay.”

  Chapter 24

  Patrick and Chance both spun around to see Devin leaning against a tree about ten yards away. “Fuck,” Patrick muttered. Chance started to pull away, but Patrick grabbed his hand and kept him in place. It was a little too late to try to hide things from Devin. “How long were you there?”

  “Long enough.”

  Patrick snorted. “Get off on watching two guys together, then?”

  Devin scowled, stood up, and walked closer. “I didn’t watch you.”

  “Right. Then what makes you say we fucked?” Patrick asked, though he was about 99 percent sure Devin was just trying to make him admit it.

  Devin snorted. “Puh-lease. I saw you getting dressed.”

  Trying to deny it wouldn’t do anything. They were wrapped up in each other’s arms. They’d been kissing. Trying to claim they didn’t fuck—whether it was more than fucking or not was moot—would have been downright crazy. Devin wasn’t stupid, even if he was acting like an ass.

  Ridiculously, Patrick’s first thought was that he didn’t want anyone else seeing Chance’s ass. Even though millions had seen him naked. He pushed the thought off and refocused on Devin. He wasn’t going to bother trying to correct the terminology. Devin knew quite well he was bi, not gay. His brother refused to recognize that. “So, you watched two naked men, then. I bet you’re disappointed you missed us actually fucking.”

  Devin crossed the ten feet in no time and reached for Patrick, but Chance’s hand shot out and clamped down on Devin’s wrist.

  “I wouldn’t do that, if I were you,” Chance warned.

  Devin sneered. “You let your boyfriends fight your battles for you?”

  “Hardly,” Chance answered. “He doesn’t need me to, as I’m sure you know quite well. I’d just prefer not to see anyone get hurt tonight.”

  With a glare thrown at Chance, Devin turned back to Patrick and pulled his hand away. “So. You don’t deny it, then?”

  “What’s the point? You’ve got eyes. You gonna tell Mama and Da?” Patrick waited, holding his breath.

  Devin considered him for a long moment, then shook his head. “No. But you can’t hide it from them forever.”

  “I know that. It’s just… not the right time yet.” He sighed. “I ha
ven’t even told them Em and I are fully divorced.”

  Devin sat in the sand next to them. “When did that happen?”

  “Back in September… right before she married her girlfriend, Sara.”

  Devin blinked at Patrick. “Wait a minute. You and your wife divorced and both turned gay?”

  Patrick sighed and dropped his face into his hand.

  Chance squeezed his shoulder, then spoke. “Patrick—and Emily—aren’t gay. They’re bisexual. You seem intelligent enough—do you think you might actually, you know, be able to remember that?”

  “Fine. Bi. Whatever. It won’t matter to Mama,” Devin grumbled. “When are you going to tell them?”

  “I don’t know, Dev.” Patrick was very grateful for Chance’s arms around him. He didn’t want to talk about this to begin with. “I figure I should tell them about the divorce first and let them get used to that, you know?”

  Devin shrugged. “Can’t change that part, true. But you know, you don’t have to—”

  “Don’t say it,” Patrick growled.

  Devin scowled. “Not saying doesn’t change its truth.”

  “Fuck you, Dev. You don’t get it, fine. Just shut up, then.”

  “What’s there to get? Do you have any idea what this is going to do to Mama? And Da?” Devin asked, glaring again.

  Patrick did, and that was the biggest part of the problem. He swallowed, frowning, but couldn’t answer that. “Look, just… don’t say anything, okay?”

  “Hey, I certainly don’t want to be the one to do that to Mama.” Devin stood up. “Just make sure you know what’s important.” With those parting words, he left, leaving Patrick feeling worse than ever.

  Chance hugged him, nuzzling his neck.

  Patrick closed his eyes and tried to figure out how to deal with this. Because unfortunately, Devin was right. He knew how upset, angry, just everything his mother was going to be. And Da, well, he knew his da was going to be angry because of what his mama would be going through more than anything else.